"If you don't do this thing, I'm gonna break your stuff on Monday!"

Monday rolls around, dude doesn't break shit.

Because breaking shit would be a war crime.

What a little bitch.

I think my time with government work has come to an end.

For the time being, at least.

My financial habits have been the thing to get me absolutely boned, and I've honestly got nobody else to blame for myself.

Thing that bothers me the most is the implication:

You get denied a security clearance based on financial situation because you could be prone to blackmail/coercion/just being a shitty "I'm gonna sell out to another country for a quick buck".

Thing is, though: I don't buy huge things, I just buy a bunch of small things to hopefully fill the depressed void.

Would sooner commit suicide than betray the country.

Buuuuuuuuut... oh, well.

Ride-sharing/Wawa, let's go!

She was a huge Hanson fan and frequently went to their website to send them fan mail.

Unsurprisingly, she never got anything back beyond the automated "message received" garbage.

One day, I found a random email spoofing tool and sent her an email from one of the Hanson boys.

Also unsurprisingly: it didn't take anything more than coming from the @hansonline.net domain to make her believe it was authentic.

To this day, I'm unsure if she ever figured it out.

...Or if she just forgot and/or got over it.

Well, she definitely at least got over it, since I don't think she's into Hanson anymore.

That being said.

I have trust issues.

Because I know there's people out there like me that do things like what I did.

Mind you, I've not done anything like that in at least 25 years, so...

I'm a changed/better guy in that respect.

But again: because I know people like me (past and present versions) exist, I know that things can't be taken at face value.

I bring that up as my current USAJobs application pool has breached 40 applications.

My main two concerns are:

• Those jobs are posted with a candidate already in mind and they're just running through the motions or
• There's a secret cabal/distro between department heads and EBM put my name on a black list

Both of those seem like they're real possibilities.

And both of those make me sad.

Still holding out to hope that one of these jobs actually works out.

...And I just got an email from one of the jobs saying they'd like to continue with the process.

Urk.

Because I don't like working on laptops.

And I've been neglecting this desktop for a good while.

So.

Since the last post, it's been about four months.

In that time, I've been unemployed.

Actively searching for new jobs, I ended up with a handful of potentials.

• (Pending, applied OCT25) The first is a technical writing job in the area. Meeting with the folks over there, they seemed pretty friendly. Bonus points to it not being located on a military base. The pay was a pretty substantial cut, but I was willing to deal with it for the potential chance of upgrades later on down the line. I was supposed to start working in November, but my security clearance "lapsed" in the month that I was unemployed? I've had to reach out to them consistently for updates, and the update has always been "no update".
• (Pending, applied JAN26) The second one is also a technical writer job, but fully remote. I didn't get a call back when they'd said I would, but just got an email back from them today saying they'd put additional interviews on hold until the last half of the month. So... in two weeks I should hopefully hear back with some good news.
• (Pending, random email on FEB26) Got a random email from a company earlier this month for a job reviewing hardware setups. Of the three, this one pays the most but would require me to make Norfolk my regular place of work again. Not jazzed, but at least it's something.
• (Unsure, random phone call FEB26) And finally, a random phone call from a government branch of the tribe I'm affiliated with. It was a pretty lengthy phone call and it's got me somewhat optimistic about a future job, but... we'll see.

And of course, the many, many, many pending jobs on USAJobs.

Every once in a while I get an email about them, but nothing particularly amazing.

Meh.

First day without having to worry about being screamed at by an irrationally angry man-child.

Thank Christ for that.

At this point, my only real concern is how he's gonna respond to that email that I'd sent out.

Assuming he finds it, I think the most likely outcome is that his incredibly weak attention span just ends up having him opt out of it. Because anything beyond a couple sentences (as he defines them) are a huge ask.

That being said, this will (hopefully) be the last time that I mention that job.

Ever again.

Because it's just not worth it.

And in the few days since I've quit, my blood pressure has calmed down and the pain I'd been feeling in my gut has subsided for the most part.

I've also been able to focus more on working at Zephyr.

And gotten a bit more active in learning C#.

...Though to be honest, I think the federal government could really learn to leverage more than just that damn techology.

But... it's whatever.

I've also got the time now to focus on checking out the folks over at APEX Accelerators.

See if I can't get me my own government contract.

Working on my own terms.

Without having to worry about other folks just slowing the whole goddamn process down.

We'll see.